My mom was an amazing woman. Her priorities were God, Dad, us, others, then herself. She was kind, generous, and a whiz at managing money. Since the economy is in the news so much these days, I will focus on her money management talents.

To use an expression I once heard, she could pinch a nickel so hard the Indian was riding the buffalo! That is no longer politically correct, but thankfully the nickels have changed now too. The updated version would be she pinched a nickel so hard Jefferson was riding the buffalo! I am sure if she had been sent to Washington, she could have balanced the budget.

I grew up in a blue collar household located in a gold coast suburb (Shorewood), yet my parents never argued about money. Mom elevated frugality to an art form. She used coupons and stuck to her budget. (She used an envelope system ala Dave Ramsey.)

Most mothers back then still cooked meals, and she was no different.  We ate up leftovers and did not waste food as many do today. Sundays we splurged and had lunch out at a modest restaurant after church and munched on popcorn for dinner. She would joke that it was against her religion to cook on Sunday! (I follow that same practice.)

Her philosophy of money management was to skimp on things that don't matter so you could splurge once in a while on something that would greatly improve your quality of life. That is how we ended up with a dishwasher back in the 1950s and a color TV in the mid 1960s. You may snicker at those two items being a luxury, but trust me, they were not the norm--even in Shorewood.

One of the items we saved money on were clothes. Mom sewed her clothes and most of my sister's and mine. She taught me to sew and I made my first dress in 3rd grade.

Another other area of savings were vacations. I think we started camping in 1958. Even though mom was not really the camping type, she saw that it was a relatively inexpensive way to see the U.S.A. We would pack up our huge cabin tent and head out to Mt.Rushmore, the Badlands, Yellowstone, Glacier National Park, etc. Those are fond memories.

I had some girlfriends who were from much wealthier families than mine. There wasn't jealousy or envy about that fact; that was just how life was. One in particular has been my friend since the 1st grade. Her parents owned a popular resort up north that was frequented by Green Bay Packers and other local celebrities. She spent each summer up there.

Her mom took her to Chicago each year to purchase all new school clothes. Because I was always interested in fashion, that was a wondrous thing to me. They also had a housekeeper who did all of their cooking. My friend seemed to have the ideal life at the time.

Recently my 1st grade friend mentioned how she thought I was the privileged one when we were growing up. She wished her mom sewed her clothes, made oatmeal cookies, and above all, she wished she could have traveled like we did on our camping trips!

In looking back at my life, I have to agree. I was privileged. I still am. So much of who I am and what I value was influenced by my Godly mother. If she were here today, I would rise up and call her blessed. She left a pair of large shoes to fill.

If your mom is still here, be sure to tell her all that is in your heart this Mother's Day.

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A number of years ago, my family decided to quit giving Christmas presents to each other. As my witty husband said, if I want a personal gift, I will buy it personally.

Seriously though, we decided that we already have so much, what else could we possibly need? It seemed foolish to rack our brains trying to come up with gift lists, so we decided we would no longer exchange Christmas gifts. The time and aggravation saved from eliminating all those frustrating shopping trips is priceless. (You could say that is the best gift ever--not needing to shop!) The money saved can be put to better use: donations to your local church, favorite charities, wounded Vets, or supporting missionaries.

We were not total Scrooges though. Since our son was young at the time, we decided he would be the only one to receive and give gifts (he paid for them himself). Now that he is older, he still gives and receives a few gifts, but at least he does his own shopping!

When I still have to go to the mall or stores this time of year, some of the conversations between shoppers seem to be all the more glaring since I am not in the frenzy too. I want to suggest, No, Aunt Peggy really won't like "The Clapper", or Don't get that set of scented candles just so Margie has something to open. 

The Christmas oriented ads of I'm giving such 'n such salon gift certificates, I hope I get some too seem to go against the whole spirit of giving. 

Another benefit of not doing the gift thing is that you'll never have to say, You shouldn't have (because it is the ugliest thing ever) and you don't have all that stuff to find places for after Christmas has passed.

Evidentially, we are not the only family thinking along these lines. In Martha Stewart's December issue (page 184) she had some "hassle-free" holiday suggestions. Here are her tips on gifts:

Before Thanksgiving or soon thereafter, send an e-mail to your family members: "Buying gifts for everyone has gotten overwhelming. Does anyone else feel that way?" Then suggest alternatives--pulling one name each out of a hat, filling stockings for everyone with little things, or instituting a spending cap. You might also think outside the holiday box. What about forgoing gifts altogether and putting the money toward a family trip next summer of a big dinner at a great restaurant?

These are still pretty much self serving, but at least if gives some ideas of how to broach the subject. Maybe the family could pick a charity or project and all donate to that cause? Or pool their finances to fly Grandma and Grandpa to see their grandchildren?

If you can't bear the thought of Christmas with no gifts to open, how about a White Elephant exchange? The gift you bring can either be the tackiest thing you have around the house or a very nice item that you just don't have a use for. (Be sure to designate ahead of time which type of White Elephant it will be.) Sometimes they call this White Elephant exchange "Nasty Santa." It is a gift game where guests pick the gifts one at a time. Each picker in turn then has the option of picking a new gift or one already opened. If your opened gift is taken, then you can pick another's open gift or select an unopened one. At the end, the first opener has the option of exchanging with anyone's gift. My homeschool group had a lot of fun doing this.

Stopping the gift frenzy was the BEST decision for our family. It has helped us put the focus on the real meaning of Christmas. I can only encourage you to think about it and maybe discuss this idea when you gather with your family this Christmas. It could make your Christmas 2009 the merriest ever!